He was charged with battery. HA! Wait, why aren’t you laughing? You probably didn’t get the joke. No problem, we’ll just wait for it to sink in.
…
Okay, you’re still not laughing. Maybe it was just an incredibly lame joke… Oh, who are we kidding, it was a fantastic joke. You just have no sense of humor, so let’s get on to business.
If you’re looking to put a 12 volt battery into a vehicle you own, you should probably take a minute to make sure the one you pick is the right tool for the job. Automotive batteries fall into 3 main categories of usage: starter, deep cycle, and marine. Using one when you should use the other will work for a while, but chances are you’ll run through your battery or accidentally ruin it in before too long if you do, and no we’re not just saying that because you didn’t laugh at our robot joke.
Look what you did.
Let’s run through the batteries and their uses real quick.
Starter
Starter batteries are called such because they start your engine. They do this by pumping out a bunch of juice in one quick surge to get the parts in your engine moving. Once the pistons are kicking, giving the proper fuel to air ratio, the spark plug will ignite the mixture and your engine will be going on its own. They metal plate this battery uses for its chemical reaction is very, very porous, as it designed to have as much metal in contact with the battery acid as possible. Use it for too long, and the plate disintegrates.
Deep Cycle
These are the kind you would use to power any non-mandatory electronic devices on an RV or a houseboat. They are comprised of much denser, heavier metal plates. While they lack the immediate “oomph” of a starter battery, they can be used for much longer durations and can be dropped down to much lower percentages of power before needing to be recharged. Think of it in terms of runners. Starter batteries are sprinters, deep cycle batteries are marathon runners.
Marine Batteries
In the runner analogy, marine batteries (also sometimes known as “hybrid batteries) are Lance Armstrong. Like Lance Armstrong, they have a good split between speed and endurance, more or less getting the best of both worlds (especially if you get a true deep cycle marine battery). Like the starter battery, marine battery plates are porous and spongy. However, the metal that comprises them is much coarser and denser, which keeps them from consuming themselves too rapidly during extended use. Unlike Lance Armstrong, though, they aren’t very inspirational, and tend to lay around lazily unless moved.
There you have it, a handy guide to choosing the right battery. Now if only the robot had made the right choice regarding battery, he wouldn’t be doing hard time at the robot prison in Guantautomaton Bay. Oh, come one! That one was funny! At least give us a courtesy chuckle. We’re trying really hard here.
