JuJuDeals

Television is a pretty remarkable technology. We don’t often think about what it really takes to make it happen. There are countless numbers of people who make their living by being part of the expansive chain of processes required to bring TV to you. However, one group rises above all others as the true heroes of the field:

The tiny people that live in your TV.

When’s the last time you thanked them, anyway? Sure, they’re really good at staying in character and pretending not to hear you, but they do. Think of how dedicated they are to that job. Just sitting around, waiting for you to turn on your TV, then quickly doing costume and scene changes as you flip the channels. They spend their whole lives in those cramped boxes, waiting to serve you. And if you have a portable TV? Forget about it! You thought a flatscreen was cramped? Just wait until you’re smushed into something the size of a wallet.

If you’re thinking of getting a portable TV, and would like to make things a little easier for the lilliputians inside it, get yourself the NT-401 Portable Widescreen LCD TV. It’s got a nice, high resolution screen, which also happens to be in widescreen format. Not something you see on too many portable TVs, and the additional elbow room will definitely be appreciated by the miniature actors. It can receive Digital ATSC broadcasts with its telescoping antenna, and can also play media from its SD/MMC slot. You can even let the little people chill in their pajamas by taking advantage of the FM radio! It’s also got a rechargeable Lithium battery, so you won’t have to pay for new ones all the time.

Get yourself a Portable Widescreen LCD TV, and thank the hardest working little guys in the biz.

We’ve heard good things about you; that you’re a promising new talent. The Agency is always glad to help an eager cadet meet their potential in service to the Crown. As you can imagine, this career tends to have a high… Well let’s just call it a “high turnover rate.” Let’s see what your chart says here, then. Hmm… Hmm… Excellent. Your test scores are well within the 90th percentile. Your obstacle course times are the best we’ve seen in three semesters. Your firearms and self defense instructors have both written letters of recommendation. It certainly seems that you have everything we’re looking for in a Double-0 Agent.

It’s likely that, by now, you’ve heard tales of the exploits of our most storied agent; 007. While it’s true that he has had many great successes and performed above and beyond the call of duty numerous times, one should know that he isn’t perfect. Sure, he’s foiled the schemes of balding would-be despots and curiously themed lackeys dozens of times, but he leaves a path of destruction in so doing. He can also be a bit… careless, you could call it, with the rather delicate equipment that Q commissions to him. This brings us to you.

Being the newest Double-0 Agent in the field, you will be given a number. As your achievements accrue and the agents above you retire, or are retired, your number will decrease. For now, you will be known as agent 0052. Unfortunately for you, being the lowest on the totem pole means you’re last in line for assignments and gear. Since 007 has once again blown through this year’s entire budgetary allotment for spy gear in the course of his latest outing, Q has decided to assign civilian equipment to all new agents. Now, I know you’ve heard about all of the sexy gadgets you would supposedly be getting upon attainment of Double-0 status, but until we can perform an audit and request more financing for the department, the laser pens, exploding mints, and x-ray contact lenses are going to have to wait. Actually, we won’t be giving out the x-ray contact lenses anymore regardless. 007 racked up another harassment suit.

Oh, come now, don’t look too down. We’ve still found some actually quite impressive pieces of civilian technology to kit you with. For instance, have a look at this; the NT-301 Portable LCD TV. It has a 3.5″ LCD screen, which is bright and large enough for you to make out the coded messages we hide in daytime TV. It receives FM radio transmissions, which is great for when a fellow agent is in the midst of battling a megalomaniacal radio DJ and pirates the signal to request assistance. Or, you know, for listening to music. Either way, the telescoping antenna can pick up those signals loud and clear. Speaking of hearing those signals, you can play them through the built-in speakers, or if you’re on a stealth mission, through the included earphones. Lastly, and this will be of most interest to you and the other agents, do you see that small slot on the unit? You can insert SD or MMC data storage there, allowing us to give you mission parameters, dossiers, training videos, and other classified information to view later.

See? We knew you’d love it. For us, the best part is how inexpensive it is. A few seasons of commissioning these affordable gadgets and we should be able to requisition you a cell phone that unfolds into a machine gun. Anyway, why don’t you go ahead and take the NT-301 with you and get familiar with it.

Oh, one final word, though. Don’t lend it to 007. He breaks everything, and if you lose this, you’re going into the field with nothing but a calculator watch.

So you want to choose a TV, but you’re still trying to make up your mind about features you need? Consult this handy guide for a few pointers!

• 7″ Portable LCD TV- This handheld device is the smallest of the group, which also means it’s the most portable. It’s ideal for tossing in a backpack or glove box so you can catch some shows when you’re stuck somewhere. It’s also a great set to have during an emergency in case traditional TV reception is rendered impossible, as it will let you catch any important information, developments, or emergency broadcasts.
• 9″ Portable LCD TV- Like the one above, only with a larger screen. It performs all of the above functions, trading increased screen size for a slightly larger body. If you want a portable TV, and don’t have to worry about packing things down to the smallest possible size, there’s no reason you wouldn’t love this one.
• 15″ LCD HDTV- Now we’re getting into the non-portable models. This 15″ TV needs to remain moored to some manner of power source (either AC or DC will do), but it trades up in image quality with a fantastic High Def picture. It also plays DVDs thanks to an in-unit disc player. This set is great if you want to install a TV on your RV, boat, or semi-truck, but don’t have a whole lot of space to work with. It’s also wall-mountable, meaning it can get installed just about anywhere.
• 19″ LCD HDTV- A decent size upgrade from the 15″ without becoming too unwieldy, the 19″ does everything the 15″ does, but bigger. With its HD picture, you really get the most out of the screen size.
• 22″ LCD HDTV- This is the largest size 12 volt HDTV you can get! If you have the space on a boat, semi, or RV, this is a great choice for your main TV and DVD player. Like the 15″ and 19″, it’s wall mountable, functions with either AC or DC power, includes an in-unit DVD player, has its own speakers, can intercept digital TV signals, and has a remote control.

As you can see, there are a wide variety of TVs to meet any of your traveling and watching needs. Just pick the one that fits your life!

Yes, the unpreventable Monday has sneaked up on you again, supplying the proverbial ashes from which next weekend will eventually be born, burning hot and bright like a Phoenix before succumbing to inevitability once more. Poor Monday; perpetually maligned. The most hated of days, Monday really does get a bad rap. There is at least one good thing about the week starting over, though, and that is new TV shows! Every network exec knows that barely anyone is hanging out at home on a Friday or Saturday night, so the weekend is something of a TV drought. With the onset of a new week, though, you can look forward to a fresh set of confusing revelations on Lost, more scathing indictments of musical performances from Simon on American Idol, another intense battle on Iron Chef, or whatever else occupies your eyes when relaxing on the couch after a hard day’s work.

But what do you do if you want to enjoy the outside and your favorite show at the same time?

Easy: portable TV. Why not bring dinner, a cold drink, and your show out onto the balcony or patio? Enjoy the evening air and the setting sun along with some pasta, wine, and The Office. Invite your buddies to the park, where you can grill up dinner and watch a sports game after playing one of your own. Take a travel show to the beach and imagine you’re on some exotic, faraway coastline. Be a total creepy weirdo and see how long you can watch a scary movie in a cemetery.

See? Monday doesn’t seem so bad when the weekend is no longer the sole proprietor of out-of-the-house activities. By using a portable TV set, you can take advantage of TVs ability to rally friends, stoke your imagination, or help you unwind. Only now you can do it on your terms. Put the leash on the TV instead of the other way around, and take it for a walk.